Married, Fat, Happy & Still In Love

by Artemis

So while I was out shopping recently, I was approached by someone casting a reality TV show about weight loss for couples. The premise sounded good at first. They were offering professional guidance from nutritionist, fitness experts, medical professionals and a relationship counselor to help you with your weight loss journey, without you interrupting your life for a few months in order to achieve success. All filmed in the comfort of your own home, as opposed to going to a “fat farm” together.

While that all sounded promising, when I went home, I took a look at their website. The description for the casting said “did you go from that happy couple to that heavy couple?” They wanted to know about how you lost your romance because you both got too fat. They assume that you must have marriage problems that can be solved by both of you losing weight.

Their premise is fixing your marital issues by losing weight together. Apparently fat people cannot be both, fat and happy, in their relationship. The show assumes couples have stopped being attracted to each other, and the magic pill of weight loss in America, will solve all of those problems.

So I called them out on it, and said that as much as having “help” to lose weight is great, lying about problems that don’t exist on national television is not great at all. And if these contestants are really having trouble in their relationship because someone is too fat, then their relationship is not one of love.  Perhaps those people should not be together.

My husband and I have been happily married for nine years. We have gained weight together. We are on a weight loss and great health journey together. We feel sexy together; we smile and laugh a whole lot and live life to the fullest.

I know that most people would have jumped at the chance for their fifteen minutes of fame, but we asked ourselves, “can we really be on TV and lie about problems in our relationship revolving around being fat… that are non-existent?”

You have to have integrity when you choose your path. Otherwise, why even bother?

My curvy readers, what are your thoughts on this?

*Artemis is the Beauty Editor for PLUS Model Magazine www.plusmodelmag.com

You can reach Artemis at www.makeupbyartemis.com


Comments

  1. says

    i’m fat and happy in my relationship. i’ve always been fat, and my boyfriend isn’t the skinniest guy on the planet, but i definitely feel the sexiest now that i’ve ever felt. strange how getting older sometimes means that you care less about what other people’s ideals are. i’m so blessed to see someone sexy and beautiful and smart and funny when i look in the mirror. i spent so many years not seeing those things in myself and not seeing them in others because i was wrapped up in this idea that i couldn’t be happy being fat, and that i definitely thought i wasn’t making the other person in my relationship(s) happy … and the source of that was my being fat. i’m so glad to be coming out of the other side of that.

  2. lady v says

    i love this article! in a way i feel they should’ve done the show to shed light. the motive of this show is to keep us feeling down and out about ourselves, those of use that do, about being overweight. this world really needs to wake up! there’s so many other reasons marriages suffer. why does FAT have to be the center of everything negative! on the other hand the way things are written i’m wouldnt be surprised if things were edited to make it seem like you two were at wits end. so glad i found this! maybe there’s hope for me on my quest for LOVE after all! :)

  3. says

    I think you are right on the money with this post. A) Don’t assume that because a person is large, they are not enjoying a wonderful marital relationship, in every aspect. B) Don’t sell your character, integrity, and potentially your marriage for a few moments of fame.

  4. loulia says

    I was never skinny and over the years Igained some weight. I am married 39 years, My husband and I are still in love and even more now in our sixties. We dont see each other by how many pounds we loose or gain. We enjoy life and we eat sensebly for our health. And we never lost our fat or skinny friends because we dont look like models. If you have a great personality, and you are a positive person you will enjoy the company of others and they will do to.
    Life is too short, be healthy, go on and enjoy it to the fullest.

  5. la jones says

    kudos to you and your husband for holding true to your values and much success on the goals you two are working to achieve together…happily :)

  6. says

    happy to get such wonderful feedback on the article and to have shown that all of us can and deserve to experience love :)
    having worked in show biz, i know that reality tv takes what you said and edit it to make it sound like you said something completely different, making you out to be a basket case, or depressed, or mean, or whatever. knowing all of these things that go on from behind the camera and in the cutting room, how could i possibly put my healthy relationship in such an odd position that disrespects it?
    :)

  7. Jen Glamour says

    Amen sister! I’m sick of people thinking in general that if you are fat you are unhappy! I’m happier than most of my thin friends. They think about diets 99 percent of the time and hate their bodies. I love my full figured curvy bits and eat what I want in moderation. Fat and happy girl here!

  8. Nikeya Young says

    GREAT POST! It’s hilarious how many people “assume” that overweight people are miserable and either A) Can’t get a man/woman to save their lives or B) MUST be having relationship problems/lack of intimacy because of this ! The truth? Many of us who are plus size enjoy happier relationships than some skinny people who mates put a lot of emphasis on what they look like and drop them for the next twig as soon as they put on a few pounds due to pregnancy or whatever reason! I am glad that you and your husband have decided not to do this show & I hooe that it doesn’t succeed! The LAST thing we need are more stereotypes perpetuated about us in the media!

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