A New Plus Size Fan Base

Christina Hendricks of "Mad Men"

For years I thought men were attracted to me in spite of my size not because of it.  The denial began when my mother would say to my teenage date, “She’s so beautiful-maybe you can convince her to lose weight”.  Acute humiliation aside, I felt she’d exposed a hidden flaw.  Maybe he was so enthralled with my personality, he’d barely notice my size.  The reality was I wasn’t getting any special dispensation. Obviously my dates liked a fuller figure.

When I was 25, I moved from NYC to Los Angeles.  A modeling job for BBW Magazine led to writing editorials and to the “Friendship Lady” (love advice) column. One of my responsibilities included managing personal ads, a precursor to online dating.  One day the printer juxtaposed the ad numbers. Everyone called to complain so I was allowed to offer a free month for the error. An advertiser listed as “tall, white handsome man” seeking  BBW with extra large calves, extra large bottoms and plenty of cellulite (who knew?) was calling to complain.  So overwhelmed with the deluge of complaints, I responded with, “Which ad would you like to run again-plenty of cellulite, extra large calves or super large bottoms?” He meekly answered, “I’ll take extra large bottoms”.  This was my entree into the world of fat admirers.

There was a young woman who sent photos to Christian men wearing a high-collared blouse, hands folded primly in front of her.  To her “sensual” seekers she sent pictures in sexy lingerie. She’d become a chameleon to adapt to her suitors.  But why wasn’t she picking them?

Some ad responses flagged for inappropriate content offered a rare view into the world of fat fetishists. These men were either fixated on body parts or a particular size/shape.  They objectified women by compulsively setting specific, strict standards for appearance. They weren’t the men I’d met or even the husbands of our readers.  Beyond this world, I knew another one existed filled with regular guys who just appreciated a woman with curves. Inexplicably drawn towards plus size women at puberty, these  men were hindered by peer pressure. My own husband hid his preference until he reached his late twenties and finally had the courage to pursue his preference.

(While working in Beverly Hills, I found an unabashed fan in Turhan Bey, movie star (40s and 50s) and infamous lover to Ava Gardner and Lana Turner. Still gorgeous at 80 something, he always stopped by to bring me little gifts from his travels.)

Our modern culture’s acceptance has been a slow, quiet movement building momentum over decades and fueled by our plus size revolution.  The forties and fifties heralded the era of Sophia Loren and Elizabeth Taylor, but the fuller figure fell out of favor during the sixties when Twiggy and Mia Farrow became the feminine ideal. The popularity of celebrities like Queen Latifah and Christina Hendricks showed our society that not only did the hips not lie, but they revealed an emerging culture of men who were ready to come out of the closet to pursue their ultimate curvaceous fantasy.  They weren’t defined by age, size or ethnicity. They were ubiquitous and some were even famous as demonstrated by a Village Voice  article on “Famous Men Who Like Fat Chicks”.

http://www.villagevoice.com/2011-05-04/news/guys-who-like-fat-chicks/

So when my tall, handsome teenage son tells me he’s “open to all body types”, I have hope for a new generation of women who can find men in any pool they decide to swim in.

Keely Shaye Smith and Pierce Brosnan

About Deborah Friedman

Deborah Friedman helped pioneer the plus-size modeling industry in New York, as one of the first such models photographed by Marco Glaviano (whose lense has also focused on former main-stream model Kelly Emberg). An interest in the film industry prompted a move to Los Angeles where Deborah continued modeling while working as a feature writer for BBW (Big Beautiful Woman Magazine). Inspired by the growing demand for plus-size clothing, Deborah entered the garment industry as a salesperson representing the Richard Simmons clothing line. This led to a career in sales and merchandising where Deborah often created designs reflecting a fresh, updated perspective. She introduced a plus-size pleat pant design that became a popular bestseller for many manufacturers. The cocoon dress, another of Deborah's bestselling designs, was proclaimed a hit by fashion critic Mr. Blackwell. While catering to celebrities at Hammacher Schlemmer's chic Rodeo Drive location in Beverly Hills, Deborah achieved the status of top salesperson. She moved on to develop her own catalog marketing firm where she specialized in promoting a variety of products -- from wind-defying umbrellas to health and fitness programs. Now, Deborah brings us her personal experience, business acumen, and appreciation for quality design and manufacture to www.plussizeplum.com an online lingerie boutique and her blog www.plussizeplum.com/blog

• Mail
|
• Web
|
• Twitter
|
• Facebook
|
• More Posts (7)

Related posts:

1. Plus Size Fashion Trend of the Day…Always for me Velvet Santa Dress
2. PLUS Fashion Trend of the Day… the Faux Plus Size Wrap Dress from Kiyonna
3. Latest Deal from Lane Bryant
4. Latest Deal From Baby Phat
5. Latest Plus Fashions at Macys