I refuse to be defined by my face, my body, my hair, or the size of my feet. I will not let anyone else define me in any way that they see fit.
I am a human being who has thoughts and feelings and ambitions and dreams just like everyone else. I have goals that are not related to my body at all – I am a proud writer, DEI professional, coach, podcaster, mother, wife, a friend… all things that have nothing to do with how much I weigh.
My weight does not make me who I am; it does not define me as a person or as an individual. My worth is not determined by how much muscle mass I have stored in my bones – nor is it determined by how many pounds I can lose or gain.
I refuse to let any number on a scale tell me who I am, or what I am worth.
If you are on a wellness journey and refuse to let your weight define who you are, here are five ways that have helped me get past the number on the scale:
- Focus on your health, not the numbers. Whether you are gaining or losing weight, it’s your health that matters the most. It’s also important to focus on your confidence levels. Stop comparing yourself negatively against other people or unrealistic expectations set by the society (or even yourself), and instead focus on building confidence in your own strengths and unique personality traits—you’ll be happier with where you’re going when you start loving where you’ve been!
- Do what you want. Make sure you’re doing what feels right for YOU, not what others think you should do or what they say will work best for them (and therefore should work best for you).
- Be patient with yourself throughout this process—it took years to be where you are today. No matter what your weight goals are, you have to understand it will take time to work towards where you are going.
- Use fashion to boost your confidence. When I started wearing clothes that fit better and made me feel good about myself as opposed to ones that were just kind of okay-looking but put me into a size range that felt “safe.”
- Get active! Join an activity you love—whether it’s dance class or kickboxing classes or even just walking around your neighborhood—and do it regularly! The more active you are, the more stronger and motivated you will become to commit to your wellness journey.
- Be real with yourself. Set realistic goals for exercise time each week (like 30 minutes) instead of setting an unrealistic goal that you can’t reach or consistently keep up with.
- Focus on what your body can do instead of what it looks like – If you focus only on numbers and measurements, you may find yourself getting discouraged in your progress because those numbers aren’t going down fast enough or not at all. To combat this, focus instead on what your body can do! Whether it’s running faster than ever before or being able to hold a plank for longer than ever before—it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t show up on a scale or in a mirror image; what matters is that YOU can do these things now! That’s real progress!
I will not let society dictate what my body should look like, how I should feel about it, or how much I can achieve.
I refuse to let anyone else—not a person, not a magazine, not an article—tell me that I am less than because of the number on the scale.
Most importantly, I will continue to live my life, succeed in my career, and pursue my dreams regardless of whether or not they fit into society’s definition of what is “acceptable” for someone who looks like me!